The Laydees

I saw some blogs recently where the writers had written a letter to their 15 year old self. I loved them! Looking back, 15 was an amazing age and I wanted to jump on the band wagon, so I got my best friends together, who I met when I was 15, and we all wrote to ourselves...

Maria, 15, what an age, you were so worried about moving bands (classes) at school, worried you wouldn’t make new friends, well you needn’t be worried, because those girls that you met, they are the best friends you’ll ever have and dare I say it, you’ll never shake them off!

You fancy yourself as a bit of ring leader of this group that you will affectionately name ‘the laydees’ in a few years time. Wasting time in classes planning ‘the Laydees Street’ or drawing mushtashes on your face really isn’t cool! Stop it now! Pay a little more attention, stop giving your teachers attitude, although you really don’t need your GCSEs, it would be nice to get some decent grades.

You thought you were so cool, running around school swapping shoes with Lucie and wearing knee high socks, but I can tell you now, it’s really not a good look. But you didn’t care, you were so free spirited and arrogant at times.

Some of your happiest times will be with these girls, just sat at Mr C’s house making up dance routines to anything that came on MTV (hard to believe your really 15, right!?).

At 15 you re-connect with a boy from your past, who will become your first proper boy friend, you will end up spending 3 years of your life with him, I don’t want to tell you that you wasted your life with him, but things come to an end, it’s difficult to deal with and some days you think you won’t be able to move on. But trust me you do.

You go on to study fashion design, which you excel at, but you don’t take it any further, because you do meet the love of your life, the man you will marry and you will have a baby! In 13 years time who would have thought that you would be responsible for another person, an amazing little person who lights up your life.

There will be some really difficult dark days that will come up in the future, but I know you are strong enough to get through it.

Stay strong, stay amazing, stay funny, stay original, love yourself, you are pretty amazing, even if you don’t tell yourself enough.

Yours eternally, Maria, 27.

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Dear 15 year old Kenzie,

Heres some friendly notes on life from someone who loves you.

Don’t say that you hate yourself and try not to think it. I know that others have things you want or are taller/ prettier?!/ richer than you but you have a lot to be very happy about.

You have family all over that no matter how little you see them love you all the time. You have amazing friends that need you just as much as you need them and will still be around 10 or 20 years from now!

You have loads to look forward to, even things you never knew you wanted.

All you think about is bloody boys! Don’t think that you will fall in love and ride off into the sunset with whoever! Your love won’t run out and if someone brakes your heart it will mend by itself pretty fast. You can invest everything you have on someone who seems right but if they are not willing to invest everything they have on you, move along.

I’d go so far as to say forget about boys all together, at least until your about 25… They are still as clueless about feelings but know a lot more about sex :)

If you were to get some upsetting news, say for instance… you might not be able to have kids. Just research it you can answer your own questions by picking up a book. On that note read as much as possible, you love reading so should do it more than you do!

Don’t spend so much time worrying about your weight. Your happiness is so much more important. Get out more, eat less crap and drink more water.

See you soon.

Lots of love,

Kenzie x

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15 year old Lucie, where shall we start?

Lets start with school because lets face it, you absolutely HATE it and hate it even more when people tell you you'll regret not learning when you're older. Oh how you thought they were crazy! But let me tell you, you will completely regret it! So please try your best, you are capable of doing so much better.
I'll let you into a little secret, in 10 years time when the internet is apart of your every day life you'll see the 'brainy' ones aren't anymore brainy than you, so get your head down!!

Stop judging yourself so much. There are lots of people out there who like you. It might take 5,10 or even 20 years to find them, but you will.
Please don't feel you have to sleep with every single lad that shows you the tiniest bit of interest because let me tell you, it ends like you could never ever imagine and it is no fun at all. Do not cheat on the man you love and don't sleep with married men - neither end well.

You really need to try your best at not being shy and go out with friends even if you don't feel like it. You'll end up pushing them away and that could end up with you in counselling in the future. There's nothing to be ashamed of but you can so easily make that never happen.

One thing I am very proud of is how you don't feel pressured into 'fitting in'. You wear what you want, when you want, even if people mock and laugh at your outfit choice. God, remember when you wore boys boots and patterned tights with a skirt? Everyone laughed but a year later every lass was wearing them! Big fat lol ;)!
Remember how happy and care free you were when you and Maria wore odd trainers to walk to school in. I'm glad you've kept that fashion sense up.

Anyway, I better go, I'm working very hard on loving every bit about you and its exhausting, even confusing at times but I know I'll get there.

Bye xxx

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Curls my love,

If I could meet u now I would slap u in the face and give you a shake for the things you're gonna regret. However one thing that will always be there are the friends you've made. I know you worried and still worry about people moving on and just disappearing from your life. You will worry about what Becky will do when she finished school because you're scared to death of being left behind. Please believe in yourself more. Because in later years you will realise that three people believe in you. Those three people will truly touch your heart. Love like that never dies so you need to hold on to that. The people who disappear weren't worth it. Stop worrying about what irrelevant people think. The people around you.....the laydees.....they think you rock. Never did I see imagine finding three of the most amazing weirdos as Murg, Ken and Lulu.

It's ok to not know what u want to do. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself. I swear to god if you carry in like this you will make me bald and the victim of a heart attack in my later years.
I want you to not be so naive. I don't want you to be taken for a ride. Stop seeing the best in everybody. You have the most amazing friends. You need to listen to them. You're gonna get taken for a ride which will in a way feel like your life is over. But when you've come to terms with it some other things are gonna happen. That will be like a slap in the face. You'll realise just how much a certain person loves you. You always knew you were friends and would always try and be there for each other but there's gonna be a shit storm in your later laydee years. Trust me this will happen for a reason. You will be a stronger person for it and it will lead to only happiness and positive things from then on. I know it's shit but I think it's what you needed. You'll have an epiphany trust me.

Apart from all the heartache. Please remember on the background those three weirdos will always be there. Maybe not over the road or in Morrison’s doing as little work as possible. But they are there. They are in your heart forever.

Haircuts........all I can say is my goodness. You're gonna go through all sorts of phases. Most of them are gonna involve you looking like a penis/man boy. But I can assure you after your 'epiphany' you find yourself. And the hairstyle most suited to you.

Basically all you need to remember is that he following are the most important things ever:

Always be true to yourself
Never put someone else's happiness first
Never doubt how much those three weirdos love you. They love the bones of you. And you love the bones of them. You would stop the making of tea and cheese for any of them
Tea and cheese and Chinese/burgers with any of the three weirdos make anything feel better

One more thing. You're gonna be one of theeee proudest people ever in many years to come when two midgets enter life.

Everything happens for a reason. Some things are fucking terrible but I pinky swear you will come out of that shit storm covered in glitter.

Grandma curls x

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Thank you to my best friends for taking part and being so honest, I love you all more than you could ever imagine

 

 

Crying & Steps!

The day started with a trip to Mothercare, the pram has broken, I haven’t even been using it for a year yet, but I’ve certainly put it through its paces, crossing my fingers for a brand new one.

I have bought a nice new one anyway – that I love! Its a dream, so I could do with getting some money back on the broken one to cover the cost of the new one...

Then to the supermarket, which is just a pain some days, since hubby works there, is takes forever to get round if Austin is awake, with everyone cooing over him, which normally I love, but he needed a nap and was getting cranky.

Since we were all home together, the plan for today was to go to a play centre, hubby has never seen Austin with other children and I wanted him to see how amazingly Austin does in the play gyms, and with other children, plus the food is delicious!

So off we all trotted, it was a nice day and as little man hadn’t napped, he could sleep on the walk.

We got there and it was surprisingly quiet, I was so excited for us all to get in there!

Even though it was so quiet, a boy still managed to fall into Austin – crying, take 1.

He then slipped trying to climb up the slide, bit his lip, blood – crying, part 2.

I put him in the ball pool, the safe place, no ‘big kids’ allowed, but, a girl, decided to do a high dive into the pool, yep landed on Austin – crying, part 3

I found out a lot of info about this girl, she was 4 and liked Frozen; she was waiting for her friend to arrive. She took a shine to hubby, not to me and not to Austin once she found out he was a boy!  

It all just seemed too much today, not the glorious picture I usually paint it to be, so we decided to leave, at which point Austin was sick, and yep you guessed it, cried some more.

He fell asleep on the walk home, poor little sausage; it must have been a bit much for him.

But it really has been such a beautiful day; we took some toys and play mats to the garden to play in the sun.

Oh, so I haven’t mentioned it yet, I suppose I should – he walked yesterday, actual unaided steps, purposeful steps towards me. Amazing spontaneous steps, he got up let go and walked right to me. I was so proud I could have cried! I tried to capture it on video but I couldn’t on my own, I got some shaky footage that I forwarded to hubby, but he wanted to see it for himself.

So treating Austin like he is a performing monkey, we have tried to get him to walk all day. He is having none of it!? I’ve put it down to him having a difficult day in the play centre.

But after tea, after his bath, in his PJs we were playing in the kitchen, and he walked from daddy to me, from me to daddy, it was so amazing, like I was seeing it again for the first time. I am so proud of him.

What an amazing early birthday present, taking his first steps a week before his birthday. Well done my little man.

 

 

Watch this space

Oops - how do so many days pass by and I have haven’t had chance to post…

Today I have made a conscience effort to write something because I am so darn excited!

I have finished work (yey!) ready for the big birthday celebrations, and because hubby is going on a stag the weekend after, I am practically taking 3 weeks off! It will be so good to spend some proper days with my boy, taking him to play groups, I think he’s missed them since I have been back at work.

Other exciting news - I received an email today, I don’t want to say too much now and ruin the surprise, but I have been invited to join as a guest in the #instaweanteam / #tastytoddlermeals !

Yes! Are you kidding me - this is so exciting!

I am taking my responsibility so seriously, luckily it’s a food that Austin enjoys, but now I need new and exciting ways to prepare it.

So I will be spending most of nap times in the run up to it researching what I’m going to do, but I already have a few ideas.

So, watch this space!

Thank you for following our baby led weaning journey

Wow!

I have over 100 followers on my Instagram account, that is amazing to think that so many people have decided to follow me to see what I am feeding Austin.

I hope I have been able to provide some inspiration to other parents out there, whether they are just starting on their weaning journey or looking for new ideas.

Why did I choose baby led weaning?

I had never heard of it before I was pregnant, and when you are pregnant you receive a tonne of 'helpful' advice and tips from other mums...

Well, a woman at work, told me to read up on BLW & Gill Rapley, I started reading her book whilst I was pregnant, but it seemed almost 'too soon' to be reading up on how to feed my baby when he wasn't even born yet.

I kept scanning it, putting off properly reading it. But one thing that stuck with me was that a baby should be fed only milk for the first six months of their life, something that is echoed on NHS websites etc, so imagine my surprise when people started suggesting I give my son baby rice when he was 4 months old.

Time to properly read the book, and it made so much sense! When I looked at my new baby son, he was so independent and so eager to learn, I knew that he would want to master a new skill, to feed himself.

He was so eager to take toys to his mouth exploring them, that I started giving him food about 5 and a half months, he didn't eat anything for about a month but he was learning to handle new shapes and textures that toys didn't give him.

I am amazed at how brilliantly he has taken to eating, and that is what inspired me to start documenting his journey, thank you for joining us on our journey.

A quiet few days...

So... a quiet few days, except really they've been any thing but!

Austin's first birthday is fast approaching and the plan for the day has been formulated! The gifts have been bought and we know what were doing! I think I am going to create a photo album just of his first birthday to show him how much effort we actually went to for him!

Then there is the hubby's big 3.0! The room is booked, a band has been booked, catering still to do, plans are forming, ideas are getting created ... it is going to be amazing!

5th wedding anniversary (wood) come on down!... so I would love to do something special for this but with having the baby & hubby not having weekends off etc... it is not looking likely.

And I want to book our first family holiday! But when to go? Where to go? Will Austin cope with a flight? Will it be too hot? Will he get bored? So many questions!

So, yes, quiet here, not so much in my head!

Today has been a lovely day, one of my oldest friends celebrated her daughters first birthday this week, we were invited to the birthday tea party.

She is now a single parent, me and my friends didn't want her to miss out on any mothers day celebrations, so we got her a little something, a card and a gift and hid it in her bedroom - she is very cheeky and has opened it today, when mothers day isn't until tomorrow!?

Tomorrow is my first mothers day, I am excited, but hubby is working all day (so I don't know when I will get my card / gift) but the most important thing is that I get to spend the day with my boy.

Surprises, Celebs and Bananas

What a lovely surprise!

I came out of a meeting today, to a message that I had missed a call... I knew instantly that it must have been the hubby :)

Excited and nervously I called back wondering if all was ok. It was, but even better, he was in town!

My hubby & little bear had popped into town to do a bit of shopping (about time since Mothers Day is this Sunday! My first I might add!)

A surprise lunch date with my two favourite people in the whole world.

Where else would we go, but for a trusty burger.

A packed lunch was provided for Austin so he could still have something healthy and baby friendly - Avacado on toasted bread and a Clementine, which he devoured. He then started eyeing up my sweet potato fries with such lust in his eyes, pointing "more! more!"

Who am I to deprive my son of a sweet potato fry or two, or three... heck we practically shared them!

Just when I thought the day could not get any better... Karl Pilkington! walked in! Well it wasn't him, I don't think, but man! He was the best doppelganger I have ever seen. I felt a little star struck to be quite honest.

I wanted to get a picture but he must get it all the time, so I just tried to enjoy my food and not stare. It was hard. I did stare.

I didn't want to go back to work after our lunch, but I had to, but it was so easy to do knowing I had had such an amazing time and knowing that we would all be back together again soon.

I was so full after my lunch that I couldn't face any tea, so Austin had an aubergine, mushroom and cheese omelette finished off with a banana and blueberry smoothie ice pop.

While we're on the subject of 'banana' I might add, that Austin is currently on banana strike! Strike imposed by me, not him, he loves them and can actually say banana; he would eat them all day if he could. Well yesterday he did...

Daddy gave him a banana for breakfast

Granny gave him a banana for dinner

Mummy gave him a banana for tea!

Daddy didn't tell Granny and Granny didn't tell Mummy until it was too late and Mummy told Daddy when he got in and found out he had given him a banana at breakfast!

So naturally, I went to Google: "can I my son have too many bananas?" Google provided the obligatory scare stories 'potassium poisoning in the elderly' 'constipated babies.'

So I have now decided that I need a 'Yumbox' and that he needs a break from banana.

The perfect balance

I am a working mummy, a part time working mummy. I am very lucky that I have family who can watch the little bear on Mondays when I am at work; hubby doesn't work Tuesday & Wednesdays so he can get quality daddy-baby time too.

I knew I had no choice in the matter; I had to go back to work. We simply cannot afford for me to be a stay at home mummy.

When little bear was born, I loved it. I loved watching him, staring at him, holding him. I was 100% completely head over heels smitten in love with him (and I still am).

I absolutely dreaded the thought of returning to work, it made me sick. I didn't want to leave him; I wanted to spend all my time with him! Irrational thoughts entered my head, "what if he forgets about me!?" "what if he hates me for leaving him!?"

But as ridiculous as it sounds, I was lonely too, I craved a conversation that didn't revolve around how many poops he had had that day.

A part of me needed to go back to work, to see different faces, to talk about different things. Mostly I listen to other peoples conversations, because my only interest is my son. And I hate the thought that I have turned into one of them really annoying women those ONLY talks about their children.

But that's the reality, my world starts and ends with him. He is 99% of what I talk about, and even when I don't mean to, I will still steer the conversation back to him.

I have 'got used' to going back to work now, and part of me is enjoying it. But to say that out loud makes me feel so guilty, I can sense I am being judged for enjoying time away for my child - I probably aren't, but it’s those irrational thoughts again.

Today was one of the days I really didn't want to go in, I felt sick in the shower thinking about leaving him; I put off leaving the house until the absolute last minute so I could spend a little longer with him.

I got through the day, looking at the clock and counting down until we were home together.

He was being dropped off at 5:30 today.

As soon as the clock struck 5:30 I kept peeping out of the windows to see if he was there... the longest 5 minutes of my life!

I have no idea why I felt like that today, I knew he was safe, I knew he was happy, and you know what he probably needs to see a face that isn't mine too!

I know that he missed me; he pointed to me as soon as he walked through the door, gave me a snorty huffy blow (to tell me he was mad that I left him) then reached out to give me the biggest cuddle.

Everyone is different and everyone does what's best for their circumstances, but I have got my perfect balance.

Count down to nap time...

When a bad day turns good!

5am! 5AM!? I thought the days of seeing 5am were long gone! But it turns out that today little bear decided 5am was his rising time, luckily for me he happily played until 6am, when he started getting bored and called for some company...

So up we get and the day beings and I start my countdown for the first signs of tiredness so we can nap!

It always amazes me how someone can have sooo much energy when they have zero caffine in their system!

He spent time running around with his walkers, checking the cupboards that dont yet have locks on (its a new cupboard!) running around with his walkers some more, climbing the TV unit, running around with his walkers, climbing through the tiniest gap in bookcase/unit before actually getting to his regular toys!

Finally - breakfast! Austin had the following:

Half a grapefruit (not keen, at all)
Handful of cornflakes
Slither of crumpet
Scotch pancakes with peanut butter

We made a beautiful video for my friends, and boom! There it was - the yawn!

TO BED!

Almost two hours, two delighful hours of rest and we are ready to take the day, again!

Lunch:

Half a tortilla wrap with ham & guacamole
Half a tortilla wrap with cream cheese & guacamole
Banana (his favourite & he can say it too!)
Apple & Cinnamon pinwheel

We met up with our friend L and her baby L and went for another lovely walk and gossip along the canal to the park, to a random undiscovered playground where the babes got chance to have a play on the swings and slide.

An obligatory trip to the coffee shop for a pick me up and snack for the babes. Then a trip to the supermarket for essentials.

Home for tea:

Homemade macaroni cheese with tomotoes
Strawberries in natural yougurt

Eek the mess! But Austin did amazingly dipping his spoon, it is crazy how much he amazes me everyday :)

Bath, book and bed for him.

Maria news - I have had my first request /contact for help with some foodie ideas for babies, which is a lovely compliment to receive and so exciting! I have been thinking and can't wait to get sharing!

Over and out - Maria

Family day

Finally, a family day! :)

I shouldn't complain, as 'family days' go, we don't do too bad, but since I have returned to work they are becoming quite rare...

Today, I got a special treat, a lie in! (yay!) But don't be fooling yourself that I have a totally amazing husband, (I do as it goes) but this was part generosity, part guilt as he is off out tomorrow night straight after work.  

By the time I had woken, daddy & Austin had already had brekki (and not taken any pics!?) of scrambled eggs and banana. I am told that Austin loved it!

I had grand plans for today, the first glorious day of the year, so a picnic was prepared! But after receiving the highest gas and electric bill todate, I decided, first things first - washing on the line. It really is crazy how much joy I get from seeing the bottom of the empty washing basket and seeing all Austin's not so little clothes hanging on the line blowing in the breeze.

Time was soon ticking on and actually probably a tad too chilly to actually eat outside so a glorious picnic at the dinner table was planned.

We dined like kings!

Cheese and Lentil wedge
Scotch pancakes cooked in coconut oil with avacado
Mini pizza on half a tea cake with cherry tomatoes
Apple and Cinnamon pin wheel



We walked along the canal, to the park, around the park and bumped into one of our little baby friends out for the day with her daddy (being chatted up by some old dears!). Austin fell asleep so no swing action for him, then back home for us.

It was Austin great nans birthday yesterday, so quick visit to nans and back home for fajita fun times, with homemade guacamole - I can't believe how much Austin loves avacado, I'm not keen, neither is hubby...

All the fresh air has knocked the bubs out today, so early night for him and film night for me and daddy, although I'm half watching while typing. RED2 is on, its ok, not as good as the first.

Fingers crossed for another nice day tomorrow so we can go to the park and maybe get on a swing!

Over and out - Maria

Toddler & Toast

Welcome - a little about me...

I am Maria, mummy to Austin (11 months).

Having a baby has litteraly changed my world, my interests and my opinions and I want to share those with you, what we get up to, what we eat (the baby led weaning way) and anything else that interesting that crops up along the journey.

I always knew I would be a mother, (as cocky as that sounds!) and as mush as he was planned, I don't think I could ever truly be prepared for what being someone's mum would bring!

It is so true, being pregnant passes in the blink of an eye, the birth as painful as it was, forgotten shortly after he was born. I remember leaving the hopsital and the midwives saying "see you in a couple of years" and my response being "paaa! doubt it!" But you know what, I could do it again!

The begining of his life, the joy, the excitment, the fear! The sleepless nights... "it goes so fast and the sleepless nights will soon be a hazy dream" they said, and you know what 'they' were right!

So much so, that it actually does feel like a dream, did I really carry a tiny baby for almost 9 months, did I really squeeze him out of my vagine into the world, watch him every day, smile, grow, amaze me. I did! I have the thousands and thousands of pictures to prove it!

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy and come back for more.

Good morning, good evening and good night - Maria